Sport that spud anywhere you go with the Potato Holster! We combined sleek and stylish with functionality and purpose, so whenever you find yourself in need of a potato, you’ve always got one handy! Whether it's saving an old lady from a home-invasion or just knocking cows unconscious for fun, the world better buckle up, cause you and your potato are rocked and ready.

20 ₱
SOLD OUT

Show the world you're kickass, nothing can stop you with potato power! Ditch that yoga-instructor man-bunned hipster named Chad you only hangout with because he lets you drive his mom's car for the last time, because you're here to save the planet, one potato at a time!

5 ₱
SOLD OUT

'Tis the season for sweet potato casserole! Prepare your special spuddy exspudtion of "we just guessed what these people might have looked like, but more Italian" door-stoppers representing the great savior sweet potato! (And plus how funny would it be if your dog ate potato Jesus!?)

40 ₱
SOLD OUT

Smelling like spicy falafel in your boss' office? Your whole family is avoiding you at Aunt Susan's funeral? Turn your pungent stench of sadness into the sweet aroma of free-range potatoes from the valley of unicorns with the Potato Perfume! If you've ever taken joy in cramming into an elevator with eight other strangers, now they can smell your earthy undertones you weirdo!

90 ₱

SOLD OUT

Always late to work because "what's an extra 15 minutes?" With the Snooze-n'-Lose Potato Cannon Alarm Clock, you'll be sure not to even think of tapping that snooze button, because it will instantly blow your mind—right out of your skull! Fires a potato at your face with 10,000 PSI (6,895 kPa) at point-blank range. Wake up every morning with that immediate feeling of "it's now or never, you glorious bastard!"

40 ₱

RECALLED

Loaded with so much money you have no ding-donged idea what to spend it on? Tired of flushing it down the toilet for fun on TikTok? Why would you donate it to starving families in Uzbekistan, when you can spend it on a useless solid-gold potato!? It's the perfect accessory to show off to all your followers that you're garbage!

105,000 ₱

SOLD OUT

This potato emits an ominous green glow, and anyone who holds it gets driven totally mad. We're not sure how, but we have a few theories:

• There's a star trapped inside

• It's an alien potato and it's going to hatch

• It's from the future

• It's a portal to another universe

• It was forged by the fire of a dragon and wields dark magic powers

• Eating it might end the world

Only one way to find out!

100 ₱
RECALLED

Forging documents to get you out of Carol's baby shower, jury duty, or maybe some stupid workplace team-building workshop? Not sure what excuse to pull out of your potato-hole? We've got you covered—just tell them you have a potato crisis, stamp the letter with the official PSAB seal, and you're free to hit the pub and drink your troubles away instead of socializing or being responsible!

15 ₱
SOLD OUT

100% official authentication by the executive chamber of expert leading authenticators and directing directors at the tribunal assembly of the Potato Safety and Advisory Board's executive panel committee at the ministry-delegation council, along with the EU sweet-potato ambassadors caucus, our task force of advisors, trustees, and their subcommittees, these two potatoes are certified, verified, classified, and gentrified 100% authentic solid potatoes.

2 ₱

SOLD OUT